I wandered through the car lot the other day, bright eyed and bushy tailed, eager to find the car that I would call my own. As I skipped through the shiny vehicles the reality of the monetary world slowly edged itself into my thoughts. Aggressively I pushed it out of my head by driving said shiny vehicles and trying out all of their buttons with my mom and sister. The slick, lovely smelling, car salesman didn't make it easier while he gently persuaded the three of us to "check out a few more. You are more than welcome to drive any one that you want! I'll go get them if you'd like". "Yes, please. I'll try that one", was my repeated reply. When I hopped into the gorgeous black, Chevrolet Equinox my heart skipped a beat. The chair hugged my back perfectly and the steering wheel felt like silk in my hands. It drove like a dream, smoothly taking the curves, gracefully coming to a stop, it even had a child lock button on the drive panel, A BUTTON! My comment to dear Jeffy the salesman upon our return consisted of three simple words, "I'm in love".
The following ten minutes were some of the most depressing I have had in quite some time. A blur of pages flew by my face engulfed in a swirl of numbers that were too large to be accepted in the common world from which I hail. I sullenly looked at the now less slick but still as lovely smelling salesman as the realization hit us both at the same time, this was a deal that would not take place. Sadly we all stood, shook hands, and left the lot without the car that I fell in love with so quickly.
Reflecting on my recent heartbreak I pondered ways that I could repair the empty hole in my thumper. Clearly the answer is a brand new car. Forget the rest of the hullabaloo that constantly harasses my brain. My other bills and extreme amounts of student loan debts that still needed paid meant nothing to me. UGH, if only I could just skip them and buy a car! My next thought was more realistic, time travel. Obviously I just needed to write a letter to my 17 year old self to explain to her the situation and then travel it back to her. Excellent.
The letter is as follows:
Dear 17 year old Whitney,
Wake UP! This is your 24 year old future self writing, listen carefully. Your future happiness rests on you comprehending this letter.
First, I am going to need you to get back into the habit of not wearing pajamas everywhere, including to school. Yes, it's comfy. Yes, school is early and you still want to sleep. However, you have a hard time kicking the habit later in life.
Now, your job. The cleaners is a lovely place to work, if you would work more hours. Stop giving your shifts away! Who cares if you have to open? Nobody comes in until 10 anyway, you know you can sleep in the back until then. At least until Dawn gets a camera installed but that isn't for a while. Better yet, get another job. What better things do you have to do? You are in high school you don't need to sit in Starbucks on a daily basis and talk about the same thing that you did the day before.
SAVE YOUR FLIPPING MONEY! This will help you when you become me. As luck would have it, your poor spending and saving habits carried over and turned into mine. At 24 you will have tens of thousands of dollars in school debt and still no savings. If you start I will have to continue.
On a similar note, this ridiculous college money thing. Try convincing your parents to divorce before your sophomore year in college. Oh yeah, the rents get divorced. You know you have seen it coming. If you can get them to do this it will do two things. 1) hopefully keep them from despising the thought of each other in the future and 2) mom claims you, so the government will pay for college. Thus, avoiding the loan money you have to pay back afterward. You will be a step ahead of the game that I am in now.
Oh yea, college, instead of going through the shenanigans of picking a major and then changing your major I will just tell you what to study. At 24 you work at an ABA center in carmel. You love it. Study it. DO IT! It will save some wasted time.
Now, for the reason I traveled back in time to give this to you. The Chevrolet Equinox. You will love this car. When it comes time for a new car in the fall of 2011 this is the one that you want. Following all of the guidelines that I have given you will get you this car. Understood?
The rest of my advice? Enjoy high school but remember it is just high school. Nobody gives a flying rat's patootie about it later in life. I know it's hard to comprehend but it's true. Go to the Friday night football games like you are though, those are the best. In college, really enjoy it. It goes by waaaaay too fast. You blink and you are old. People actually do care about their friend's they had in college after they graduate soooo you are free to actually care while you are there.
Much Love,
Whitney/you/me/......well you know.
P.S. Chevy Equinox. That is all.
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